Open Up Your Heart

I like my girlfriends better.

cry, crybaby, cry.

I need you and you and you and you and you.

now.

For making me feel so alone.
For making me close up and never share how i feel anymore.
For making me get upset at my friends.
For blaming me every damn night..
I hate you.
For calling me a bitch.
For making me throw up after I eat.
For making me ashamed.
For making me hide.
For making me feel low.
I hate you.
For blaming me.
For texting me all the time.
For making me feel like the biggest shit on the planet.
And most importantly for making me cry. everynight for the last month.
Some nights/ days more than others.
But i hate you. and that makes me cry still.
Every.damn.night.
I hate you. For going from the person I loved the most to someone I hate.

IT ISN’T AS EASY AS YOU THINK.

So shut up, all of you.

Please.

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Yep. Solid.

People take advantage of the fact that I feel guilty so easily.

Stop taking advantage of me.

“Don’t ever get your hopes up. Life isn’t going to be like the movies, love can be predicted. People will always get upset with you no matter what you do. Boys aren’t like the movies and neither is love. Sorry to be so simplistic, but it’s true.”

I need a hug. I’ll take any offer.

To go to a dance, not with a boy exactly. Just with friends will do.

And then completely and entirely lose myself to the music.

I love the way my body can move.

It is so refreshing.

It is your fault. If you would’ve treated me right from the beginning we wouldn’t have been here. If tired sooner. If you would’ve listened and done as I asked. If you would’ve left me alone. If you would’ve not said all of that last night. If you would’ve not lied. If you would’ve been the boy you said you are. I don’t hate you, I never will, I don’t think it is in me to be that disgusted with a person, that I could say I hated anyone. I am sad, sad how desperate you have become. Sad that you like to blame me. ME. The one who loved you more than anyone ever will. The one who stopped at nothing to make you smile, the one who accepted your flaws. The million and two that there are. But you said things and did things that slowly made me lose my love for you. And now you are pushing me to lose my liking for you. Right now, I want absolutely nothing to do with you. After this weekend. I want out of the picture. Gone. Bye bye. Maybe later I wont avoid you in the hallway, and will be able to say your name with a little bit of compassion behind it. But right now, it is only disgust. Don’t you dare blame me. Want to see the problem, take a long look into the mirror.

this is beyond impossible. So I will just do my two favorite AT THE MOMENT.

1.Nicest Thing- Kate Nash.

2.Lying is the Most Fun a Girl can Have with out Taking her Clothes off.- Panic at the Disco. (Thanks kenz.)

1. Despicable me. (For the child in me.)
2. Bridget Jones Diary (For the girl in me.)
3. Lord of the Rings (For the nerd.)

1. love rules
2. miss match series.
3. two-way street.
4. All harry potter/ anything by nicholas sparks

annnnd 13reasons why.

i want to stop crying.
I want to talk it out.
I want to eat icecream
I want to hug.
I want you to understand.
All you had to do was ask.

I want us to be ok.

In the midst of all the happiness I still find something to complain about. That is the definition of man, wouldn’t you say? We never have a problem being pessimist in a world full of joy. I constantly wonder why? And when wondering my brain wonders into various lands far far away. These people are supposed to be the world to you. And do as you ask. Not because it is a force but because it pleases them to do so as well. Yet this is not a favor I could ever ask. What I can ask for is for mouths to be sealed so I can close the door and walk in the other direction. I wish there was a line that parted the two so it would never be a problem. What’s mine is mine and whats yours is yours. Sharing always leads to drama. It is best when we all have our own toys.